written by ella smith
With age comes wisdom; at least that's what my mother always told me. It's a basic notion that as we mature, we learn more about life. As I get older, I've learned that there are certain ways to live your life that bring happiness and other ways that just bring stress. Life is about finding what makes you happy, and removing those things that make you upset.
As humans, it is human nature to want to be liked and accepted. To fit in and avoid situations that lead you to be isolated. But somebody once told me, “life is good if you know how to live it”, and that helped change the way i perceived life. It made me realise that I don’t need to hold myself to a certain standard that fits “social norms” in today’s society. I don't need to live my life following ideal notions of what people want to see. I can break out of that and just be myself.
It took a long time to figure out, but the secret to life really is not giving a fuck.
Because caring about what other people think will never bring you happiness. How many of your thoughts are devoted to the opinion of others? That heavy burden that weighs down on you day in and day out, stems from the opinions of other people. Why is it that so much of our happiness is wrapped up in the opinions of others? One insult has the ability to send you to the deepest depths of misery and self-loathing.
I have a friend, who when I first met her, had crippling anxiety about what people would think of her. She would remain quiet and not really speak up, or bring attention to herself. A year later, and a year of showing her that you should always be yourself, regardless of what other people think, she is a lot happier and content with herself. She doesn’t care about laughing too loud or burping in public, or making jokes that only her and I will understand.
My friend and I were recently told that we were “embarrassing” and need to “piss off, and get a life”. An insult that isn’t really an insult at all. I for one, am never embarrassed by things, especially when it comes to my own personal humour. The real issue comes from the person who said those things. If we are not embarrassed about how we choose to express ourselves in the form our personality, then why are you? Why do you care? And just to break this insult down further, I don’t really understand the whole “get a life” meaning either, because surely, I have a life, otherwise I wouldn’t, oh I don’t know, be alive? Rather than expressing your concerns on our perfectly immaculate humour, maybe you need to work on what is missing in your life in order to not feel embarrassment for other people?
I read an article recently, that explored why you really shouldn’t give a crap about what other people think about you, and here’s what I gained from it:
Everyone else is just an observer. People don't care about you, they just make judgements, and those judgements don't mean shit. So stop caring. Give up. Be yourself and let everyone else worry about that unnecessary bullshit. And if you still need reassurance, here's all the reasons you really need to stop caring about what other people think.
They Are Wrong
The truth is, people are idiots. You learn this as you go through life. There are a lot of stupid people out there, and a lot of people who will want to see you fail. It's human nature, and some people just have a meaner streak than others. I don't know why little kids tease each other, but it definitely proves that some kids are just arseholes by nature. You must remember that arseholes don't matter. Their opinions aren't worth a damn in this world and by caring what they think, you will only live your life in misery.
It Will Bring You Down
If all your happiness is wrapped up in the opinion of others, you will never be happy; it's that simple. If one small insult, one jab, one bad opinion of you sends you into a deep depression and a fit of self-loathing, you will live your life scared of every word. You can't live your life being vulnerable so that one thing can change the entire course of your happiness. It takes courage and will to stop caring what people think, but once you do, you will be a stronger person for it.
It Will Keep You From Your Dreams
If you are constantly worried about what other people think, you will never get to where you need to go in life. You are going to have to do things that don't always meet people's standards. You will come into situations where you have to put your pride, and your reputation on the line to get what you want. If you are constantly worried about what people are thinking, you will never have the will to do what's right.
You Will Keep Meeting The Wrong People
If you aren't acting like yourself, you will never meet anyone to appreciate you for who you are. You will also never meet people that you like, because they aren't really people that your true self would want to hang out with. If you act like a stuck up bitch, you are only going to meet stuck up bitches.
Opinions Aren't Truths
Opinions are like arseholes, everyone has one. Who gives anyone the authority to think his or her opinion is the right one? People say shit all the time, that doesn't mean any of it is ever valid. People have a tendency to talk when they don't know what to say, making them ignorant and usually incorrect. So next time someone says something about you, shrug it off because it's just empty words.
Life Is Too Short
You get one shot at this, so why the hell would you spend it worried about people's opinions? Do whatever the hell you want, be whoever the hell you want. You're never going to see these people after you're dead anyways. You probably won't even see them in a year from now. Live your life like it's just you, and you will finally be free.
So to the people of this world, my motto in life is to “fuck it and be free”, because why trap yourself in the confinements of society? If you spend your life worrying about what others think, you will never truly be free to be yourself and find out who you really are. So, fuck it, ignore others opinions about you, because they are just that, opinions. Not everybody will like you, or understand you, and that’s ok, because you will feel the same about other people, too. Not everybody will have the same humour as you, and again, that is fine, because we are all different individuals and the way we choose to express ourselves is entirely up to the individual. Yet, there is still another issue that needs to be explored. Great, you’ve learnt how to not give a fuck and move in with life regardless of other people’s opinions. But this brings me onto a new exploration; why do people have these judgements of others? Why do people care to have an opinion, or feel as though they can be the voice of the nation? Stay tuned for the 2.0 of this article.
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